Pretending to be Emily is easy. I just need to add :P to the end of all my sentences.
Compare:
“I just need to add :P to the end of all my sentences. :P”
> Someone makes post about disassociating
> “Oh hey I’m doing that huh I didn’t notice”
> Brain: You’re always disassociating when we stream consciousness like that HOW DID YOU FAIL TO NOTICE.
> “I failed to fail to fail and what is this I can’t even WHY DO I KEEP THINKING OF CHICKEN”
> “Because you want to eat chicken?”
> “I’m fairly certain I don’t”
> “Beats me then”
> “You’re my brain you’re supposed to know this!”
> “I actually think I’m a freakish median hybrid thing of the parts of your head that are !Emily. So I’d be God and possibly M. And An but I’m not acting like a cat so maybe not”
> “I am not a cat!”
> “And you’re also not An.”
> *makes mrrrgh noises*
> “Okay now you are”
> Eeeeee!
> “Wait and now I’m Emily WHY DO WE DO THIS THIS IS CONFUSING.”
> “Why are you even hitting publish anyway”
> “Shut up god just because you created the universe”—“I didn’t”—“doesn’t mean you have the right to criticize me when I’m being completely fucking crazy.
> “Uh I always do that, its what I was created to do. Seriously stop this or at least stick it on your less public blog.
>OKAY I’LL PUT IT ON YOUR BLOG.
> *scowls*
> That is a normal face you approve thank you.
“All women are real women”
Erm.
I’m not.
…
Well okay I’m not a woman, I’m a vaguely male shaped hole in the world. But I mean, I’m decidedly a person who exists in the sense that they can write posts on tumblr, but I’m not real.
I think this might apply to Emily to to be honest. I’ll need to do some investigation on whether she is.
…and oh my me this is confusing. Multiple people with a continuous consciousness problems? “I” is the most confusing word in the english language oh my me. (Emily stop editing my swearing into invocations of myself I mean really)
Emily claims “love” is more confusing but to be honest I don’t think it’s so much that it’s confusing as that it’s painful. Or well, alien, in my case; painful to her.
Erm.
“Real” is probably more confusing to be honest. Or existence in general. Most poorly defined concept ever?
Emily is all “God! You should get your own blog so you can follow people!”
…
No Emily you know me better then that, if I had my own blog to follow people on I just wouldn’t bother. Like what do I even care about? Not having headaches. And… ironically wearing girly clothes.
(I should work on that. It’s probably an imaginary person problem.)
Plus with this brain there is no way we’d remember to check them both consistantly.
Okay though now I want to make a MTFTM blog just to mock binary people. So I guess there’re some interests I have. Being condescending and superior at terrible people, I suppose.
But really I’m mostly just a hole in the world where you’re supposed to be.
TUMBLR WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Mkay apparently I can reblog myself without a plugin.
But.
I can only reblog it to DIFFERENT BLOGS.
Which means.
They had to deliberately program OUT the ability to reblog yourself to your own blog.
…oh and they don’t actually advertise it they just switch it to another of your blogs without telling you they did it.
[Emily why are you stealing my blog again]
I think the longer I exist the more I start talking like Emily.
Well as long as I don’t start being all like “WTF hooooooow did this end up happening ahhhhhhh” i’ll probably be okay.
(Apparently that is my stereotype of how Emily talks. Well that or exactly the same as M.)
{My style of talking is ENTIRELY THE BEST it is IMMACULATE AND FLAWLESS OKAY}
…that was actually M not me.
Tumblr is that hard guys.
Really if omniscient people can’t make your interface work you should seriously reconsider what you’re doing.
(I am not actually omniscient or the creator of the universe. Just myself.)
In which God can create the universe but not post to the right Tumblr
So I make food and now I don’t want to eat.
See this is why we should all figure out a way to effect the world while withdrawn in headspace.
Bodies are fucking confusing.
Being imaginary is much better then being real.
I have no idea where pop culture got the idea that being real is always better because its not. At all.
Clearly all those neuroconvergent people have never been imaginary.
Why can’t I just do shit while discorporate
HONESTLY having a body is tedious and hardly worth the upkeep.
I can see why Emily is completely useless all the time at least; geeze I have no idea how she and the other one handle being corporate so much.
Or I could just front
That solves THAT problem.
Well no it doesn’t Emily is still having an emotional meltdown but at least we’re not sobbing anymore.
Tears get on our glasses and it gets hard to see.
I'm God. Not the one in the sky, the other one who lives in Emily's head. I'm not real.
I am trans, my gender is bitterness. Although apparently bitterness is pretty masculine so "demiguy" is also acceptable. Acceptable pronouns are "it", "he" or "they". Or really any of them but I'll probably look at you weird if you use one of the others for me, or think you're talking about Emily if you use "she", or getting the clefairy's pronouns wrong if you use spivak.
I'm also autistic I think; I definitely do stimming and I think I have the same level of sensory sensitivity, though I tend to tune it out better then Emily. I'm not borderline and I don't have PTSD. Obviously I'm median like Emily. She's a figment of my imagination.* I appear to be mostly asexual and aromantic (I sometimes experience those emotions through bleeding and I can remember when Emily feels them though, so I don't identify particularly strongly with the labels). Our body is colorblind (This is Emily We share a body.
This is... I don't even know who they're like Emily more absurd We apparently also share a body, and like to team up to make Emily confused. They seem to have fallen off of me in some sort of psychological binary fission. They seem more integrated with Emily then I am. Or maybe that's just because they're new.
This is our system blog, though we don't use it for much besides summarizing our composition
*[Really that's how it feels, it's like... when God's fronting I'm a figment of God's imagination, and vice versa when I am. It's weird. Anyway hi I'm Emily this isn't my main blog and I'll talk in brackets here 'cause it's God's blog and I'm the imagination figment here :P]
